‘I was diagnosed with tonsillar cancer about 18 months ago. I thought it was an earache that turned out to be the tumour pressing on my auditory nerve and went through the full degustation of cancer treatment which is radio, chemo and surgery.
‘I’m a stand-up comic and used comedy as a way of coping.
‘The funniest moment was the anal swab. An anal swab is exactly what it sounds like. For some reason, things happen in the hospital at quarter to five so I was woken one morning and a lovely many said, “It’s time for your anal swab.” He did his business and he disappeared.
‘The weird thing was I kind of woke up the next day and I was wondering and asked the nurse, “Why do you do an anal swab?” She said it’s to prevent infection spreading around the intensive care unit. Not being a medical person I thought maybe if they wanted to prevent infection spreading around the intensive care unit there wouldn’t be one bloke sticking his finger in everyone’s bum.
‘I said to the nurse the next day, “What is the deal with the anal swab?” Nurses have the best sense of humour on the planet as they see humanity at its best and worst. And she said, “We don’t do anal swabs at this hospital.”
‘I never saw him again. Nor did he call. I didn’t get any results but he did swipe right so if this was Tinder, I’d be in luck!’
‘I used to work on breakfast radio every morning on triple j and I’d wake up at 4.30 and leave the house when it was really dark and no one was out. But there’d be an old lady that slept out the front of our apartment door. She was there every day for a year.
‘It was kind of weird as I would always ask her if she needed anything but there was always a disconnect between her and myself. I guess that comes down to communication and what I can offer someone in that situation.
‘It’s not just money – it’s a blanket or do you need a phone call, or an OPAL card? Do you need a shower or do you need to use the bathroom? It’s those things. Taking part in the Newtopian Sleepout is definitely opening my eyes up to everything.
‘I’ve learnt a lot about homelessness so far – about how prevalent it is and how difficult it is to get out of the system. So many Australians, and I have as well, get caught up in this mind-set that we have Centrelink, why don’t you just get the dole, you know? You never really understand the complexity of any issue until you place yourself within that community. Not that I’m necessarily doing that just by sleeping in Newtown Square for one night but certainly just by being a part of this program I’ve learnt a lot more about homelessness. It’s made me more aware of what I can do as an individual in everyday circumstances that I will now be more aware of.
‘The thought of homelessness is terrifying. There are so many things that life could throw at you in any situation. I guess we all have our time at being “the one” at one stage or another and for now everything is good in my life and that’s why I’ll help out while I can.’
‘When I was 12 years old, I stepped on stage with 140 other young people as part of the Cumberland Gang Show which was a Scout and Guide show at Parramatta Riverside Theatre. It filled me with so much joy to be making people laugh and smile by being up on stage. I couldn’t see any of their faces because they were in the dark and I was in the bright lights.
‘When I was doing a comedy sketch on stage and I was making people laugh, I was addicted to stand up from then.
‘As a creative person who doesn’t have the security of a regular income, I feel like the toughest thing for me is knowing where my next thing is going to be. Often I don’t know where that is. I pretend and people believe me sometimes and give me lots of money to do it but I just don’t know where those opportunities lie.’
If you could give one bit of advice to people, what would it be?
‘Keep it real. Be honest. Honesty is always the best policy when you’re doing comedy or when you’re doing anything.’